Spiders

Let's just say I'm not a fan.


A few times I've come home and walked into a spiderweb right across the path to my front door. Now, a more paranoid person would think that they were trying to catch ME. But they'd never actually do that. Would they...?

It's a bit ambitious...

I don't run away screaming if there's a tiny arachnid at the other end of the room (unlike a certain bloke I know). No, I am a man. I can quite happily pick one up and stride across the room with it in my hand and throw it out of the window/door. I prefer not to squish them - too messy, especially against a wall.




Having said that... they still give me the creeps, the big ones. I think it's just the way they move. Too many legs. Scuttling. (shudder) Ugh.

And while I'm at it, cucumbers can fuck off too.
(For pretty much the same reasons)

EEbEEb

I agreed to teach Sarah the piano.

The trouble is she's bloody awful.

Not so much at playing, more at being taught.
She's persistent, which is a good thing. You can't learn if you give up practicing after a few minutes. But she refuses to follow my suggestions - eg practicing one hand alone, or just a few bars at a time until she's got the hang of it. No, she insists on trying to play the piece all the way through.

Again and again.

And again and again and again and again and again...

Just the one piece. Over and over.

It's Für Elise by Beethoven. I reckon if someone could rig up a kind of coil system at his cemetery, we could use the amount Beethoven must be turning in his grave to generate electricity for most of western Europe.

The same notes. Over and over

The security alarm went off at work last night. People don't like it at the best of times. It's worse for me - it's the same notes.

DA da DA da DA...

AAAargh!!

GAGA

Today, I listened to the radio on the hour-long drive home from work.

Flicking through the various stations I discovered that Severn Radio & Wyvern FM are identical, as in ACTUALLY THE SAME apart from a 5-second time delay and different adverts. Does this happen a lot? Is there just one independent station broadcasting throughout the country with different adverts for local companies? Is there a national shortage of DJs? Hope so...

Anyway, I carried on channel-surfing.

I found BBC Cmyru. Now, I don't speak Welsh, so someone tell me - is it actually a real language? Honestly? Cos it sounded like they were making it up to me.
The songs sounded like they were being sung backwards. The chat in between made no sense at all, not least because the presenter kept saying "Peanut Butter" amongst all the other words.

I assume there isn't a Welsh word for peanut butter.

(And if you're looking for one, I propose the word "Spaff".)

Neolo gism

At the weekend, I learnt a new word I'd never heard before: Spaff

No idea what it means, but it's a great sound. Spaff. I've started using it all the time. Spaff spaff spaff. You should too...


edit: um... don't bother looking it up ...er...

Mmmm

I don't like turning down invitations. Therefore I tend to overbook myself.
For example last weekend, starting & ending in Cheltenham I went out to visit friends & family in Birmingham, Chelsea, Finsbury Park, Covent Garden, Wimbledon, Gerrards Cross and (just like a real life game from I'm Sorry I Haven't A Clue) Mornington Crescent.

I'm fucking knackered.

The best part was when Sarah & I trudged back to the car from the supermarket, we sat in the heat & drank a whole packet of chilled, Waitrose finest, tomato & basil soup, from the container.

Absolutely gorgeous.

Like a big Tomato Slush Puppie.

Shocking

Last week I went on an intensive Advanced Life Support course.

We were given scenarios and asked to demonstrate how to manage the situation, eg how would you resuscitate a pregnant drowning woman who had accidentally inhaled a peanut and was now also having an anaphylactic reaction. Great fun.

(The most important thing I learnt though is that people give you a lot more respect when you're holding a fully charged 5000 Volt defibrillator.)

Japanese Queen

Bohemian Rhapsody

Killer Queen



Proper blog post soon (including Myspace and how not to play the piano)

Say what you see

Just doing some last-minute pharmacology revision, pre-exam.

My favourite search site has a new Voice Recognition feature, so I clicked on it and said "Haloperidol" into my microphone.

This is what came up.

(I think the software still needs some work)